19. First book review: Thirteen Reason Why by Jay Asher

Before starting this review, let's take a rewind on the plot of the story. (This one is for the ones who were planning to buy the book but was searching for some reviews if its good or bad.)

Cover of the book. There is another colored version though.

Hannah Baker is dead for two weeks. No one really knew how it happened or who did it but rumours are spreading that it was because of a suicide. A suicide that no one knew why she did that or how she did that. Clay Jensen received a package for him from an anonymous which contained cassette tapes. But these weren't just cassette tapes, these were Hannah's voice explaining thirteen reasons why she got depressed to commit a suicide. There were thirteen people on Hannah's list, the reason why she killed herself and the only people that could have the tapes were the ones on the list. Clay Jensen was mortified because he knew to himself that he never did anything wrong to Hannah but as he listened through the tapes, every question that was bugging on his mind ever since the tape was delivered to his home was finally answered.

Okaaaaaaay. Was it a good summarization? :p hahahaha! Well, I'm not really good in summarizations but I hope you did understood the plot.

Lets begin the review by saying that I loved the book but was finding something extra to the ending of the story. I loved it because the novel simply tells us how simple mean things could destroy one's personality. This book explains that bullying could literally kill people. Maybe not through their bare hands but their power to upgrade someone's willingness to favor death. It is because for the others, being sarcastic was their own way of being happy or making other people happy but they have no idea how they could destroy one's feelings. Maybe other people would just say that Hannah Baker was just whining about her life and its not too dramatic or reasonable enough to kill herself but for me, it is reality. Suicide is the only escape of teenagers nowadays from all the criticisms and racisms that our society has been given to them, or to us. It is because for them, if their life suck then why should they continue it anyway? And I think that if the novel would be too dramatic by adding financial problems or having a broken family, it would be a typical, drama book to be led by a girl who committed suicide. We've already watched dozens of those and what do we get, the same ending! This book focused on how a teenage girl's perspective on life changed after everything that she has been through. Hannah Baker had been spread dirty rumours from her first kiss, turned back by her own friends, used by the only girl who was apparently nice to her, touched by a stupid ass in his school and made someone die without telling the cops who did it. Now, if you were on this situation, would you still have the courage to walk in the hallway of your school with confidence, knowing that everyone was thinking that you're a dirty sl*t? Well, that's my point. That is how I loved the book because it made me realize that I'm not the only one who was feeling the way I am feeling now. I could relate to it and I loved it how Hannah gave the tapes to the people on the list so that they could know the whole story of Hannah Baker. The real one, not the edited one from all the gossip around school.

My favorite quote from the book. PS: the picture wasn't mine. Just found it on google.

But I was also finding something extra on the ending because its like there's no twist or something at the end. SPOILER ALERT! Clay Jensen finished the tape, got depressed then sent the tapes to the next person on the list. And then what, he had the courage to talk to the girl he liked for so long because he was afraid that he might not have the chance anymore, just like the chance she lost with Hannah. And then, done! No major ending. Its done. I was kinda hoping that Clay would talk to the other people who heard the tapes and ask why did they do that to Hannah because he was into her right? Or have them say that they shouldn't have did those bad things to Hannah.Or going to her grave, 13 of them would be actually great. To apologize for the things that they did and to say the things they should have said when Hannah was alive. But, no. Its like, fine Hannah was dead. I'm depressed now but let me just say hi to Skye. That is how I felt at the ending. It is because endings should be the best part. Thats why I was disappointed at the ending. And it wasn't very clear whether Clay's mother knew about the tapes or not because it seemed like she was concerned about her son, but never really explained why. Did she knew? Was it possible that Hannah also let her listen to the tapes, just like what she did to Tony? Well, yeah. I did have a lot of questions...

The book was really nice but I think its not very polished. Maybe they should add another chapter into it, or have a sequel because I think its an open ended story but I think its kinda impossible because the book had been published a couple of years ago. They even said that Selena Gomez was going to star in that film that's why I'm so excited to see that. But the news was way back on 2011 and until now, there weren't any reports on whether they would continue it or not. And I begging them to please, please make that a movie. Though, I would be really happy if Emma Roberts would be Hannah but please, continue your plan on making that a film because maybe this would change some people on how they think on gossiping. And I am longing to make that happen.

I saw this and the tweet was on 2013. So does this mean that it would really happen on 2014 or 2015? :D

18. Graduation Day

Graduation Day. It is said to be the saddest part of high school for this is the day where everything ends. The fun, the pain and the stressing PeTas. Others even had a countdown to Graduation so that they could cherish their last years in our Alma Mater. But why did I feel neutral at that time?

Obviously, this is a stolen shot by my father. I didn't put too much make up on my face anymore because (1) I was too lazy and (2) I dont know how, neither my mom.

Filling up some form for Colorpoint. If you could notice, we were wearing skin tone stockings and closed black heels and do you know how it feels? H-O-T!

We paid 120 for the pictures that would be taken on stage.

Okay, I look too white here.

And here.

And my hair.. looks so long here. Hashtag throwback long hair? :3

w/ mom

w/ dad

I really like this photo. This was really a stolen shot and I think I was laughing at dad here. It looks like I'm so excited to graduate. 

Students were asked to gather on the quadrangle and the parents were asked to go to the school's auditorium on the 4th floor. Many parents were actually disappointed for not letting the school use them the elevator while they were bragging it all along.

Outside the audi.

This is actually the place where we eat when our president told us that eating inside the classroom is prohibited and it served as my haven since it seems like everywhere is so noisy.

From left to right : Rebo, ME, Aira, Wisco, Chris and Cheska.

Our auditorium. Hindi Natitinag ang Pusong Pilipino! Boompak! Though I really don't get the connection between the quote and graduation.

Here's the vid. Apparently, this thing just made my download so slow! 

The choir aka Locus Dominicus. They were really good and I'm proud that one of my friends is a part of it but on the day of graduation, someone kinda destroyed the blending. And that someone is shhh.

Locus Dominicus' pianist

Chris! Hahaha! My first and only gay close friend. I was actually surprised that my dad took a picture of him. 

Then I realized that my family was just too amused that I had a gay friend.

Its our turn!

Hey. its Abby!

Its me! Hahaha! I was actually glad that the LCD wasn't clear because if it was, then the whole batch would see my awkward smile on my grad pic. 

Me shaking hands with Sister.

Being there on stage really gives me goosebumps even though I knew that everyone would do the same thing that I will do. Maybe it was the fear of making mistake? I don't know but it also seems like I was just glad that high school life is finally over.

I only studied in Dominican for only 2 years. There was a big comparison between my former school and this school. DS was a lot stricter than MC (former school) and DS made me awake until midnight for some damn PeTas while MC never did that to me! Hahahha! But Dominican also taught me time management, especially during Peta Week, that could help me in my college life and that a place could be in order if there was a good leader.

But even though there was a big comparison, the ending between my two schools was still the same. While I was on stage, I could feel that there were some girls, and maybe guys, that was laughing at my walking or the way that I hold my diploma. I also felt the same way but the only difference is, I knew who my enemies were on Maryhill but on DS, I could feel that they were all silent killers. :o

Though I was really thankful for the warm welcomes they gave me on my first day and the oh-so-flattering compliments on how beautiful I look and everything, I was also sad that almost all of them were silent killers. :)) but there are also some that reveals their true identities but the only thing is that I never knew why they hated me, until now that I graduate. Maybe it was because of my face? My walk? My eyes? I really don't know but I was glad that they came into my life because without them, I would never learn how to ignore criticisms. So I guess I became stronger because of them. :) hahahha!

Mama P with the curls! Hahahhha!

"Ang problema parang aso. Pag tinakbuhan mo, hahabulin ka kaya harapin mo na lang."

I can say that four years in high school can make a student change the way s/he looks on life. It is because high school was the time where adolescence began to grow and because of that, problems weren't treated the same way we do when we were little. Too much problems make us change our own perspectives in life and makes us realize that 'You are in the real world. High school is not like in the movies where you would find your BFFs and high grades instantly. You would have to experience a lot of hardships before you would have them.'   This realization hit me in the hard way. But in the end, I'm still glad that I didn't flunk my grades to be a repeater or anything. Guess, its still an achievement afterall.

Every section has a video presentation and I think the shot is from SDG? And was our presentation nice? Well, it was okay except that not everyone in STA belonged to those pictures and the fact that we couldn't understand the voice-over. Oh, and we couldn't also see the pictures cause its too dark.

Grad song! It is entitled I'll Always Remember You

Graduation songs were meant for the students to cry for internalizing the song but its not very effective. You know why? Because of the actions or may I say, interpretative dance. -_-

Watch the Grad song video!

Stolen! This was after the whole program. Next part? Picture picture!! :))

From left to right: Wisco carrying Ceph's sister, Cephreign, Abby, ME and Sha.

Jerxie, Abby and I are actually hugging each other at that time. And I think Abby stepped on my shoe thats why my expression is :o

SRP! Haha! 3rd year buddies and actually my friends until the senior year. I was glad that I kept some friends though there are times where I thought that they would not last. But apparently, it did. And I was happy.

W/ abby. She was my friend since 3rd year and I could reckon how she told me that she never thought that I would be her friend because she thought that I was going to be popular and all. She was one of my very close friends and she's the one that I could really trust about the backstabbers in school. Shh! :))

I really like this photo to be my DP but the faces of the people around me was so epic. Haha!

Chris with the berry good smile and Aira's epic face. Hahahhahahahha!

Its the hardest part of having our parents have cameras taking pictures of us, we don't know which camera we would smile at.

:p hahahahha!

STA buddies with Dandan and Jerxie. Hahahha! I was really excited when I learned that I was going to be STA. And I was more glad when I found out that the students there are the 'nice kids' thats why I enjoyed my first quarter. At first, we have a group called "Truepa" which includes Chris, Rebo, Sha, Wisco, Abby and me then it expanded into "I Sqaure You" which included almost half of the girls in our section. It is so fun to be with them and I would miss all our corny jokes, always led by Baltan. :))

Though, there are always some people whom you're always hesitant to trust or not. It will never be erased in high school life. Sometimes s/he is not one of your circle of friends but don't let it get into you. Always remember, only you could create your own happiness.

They were kinda laughing at me at this picture, I think, because I was still wearing my toga.

Still the same pips. Oh, there's Clarence on the left! 

"Guys, dun naman tayo mag-smile!" HAHAHAHHA!

My father congratulated Chris for graduating thats why my friends laughed at him and mockingly throw punches at him. 

w/ Aimee!

Selfie! Hahahaha!

Laughing buddies!

My everyday life in Dominican was a laughing day because of them. Sometimes we won't realize that we've been laughing for hours because we were laughing bout stupid things especially last year! But it kinda changed when we became seniors. :/

Maybe its because we weren't all classmates but I was a guess that it is just because some of us changed. Maybe not really changed because I was thinking that they've been like that before I met them. In short, I just knew their real selves. 

But its my choice if I would ignore it and just accept them for who they are or just simply ignore 'them' because I don't want to have a friend like them, but in the end I still stayed as their friends though I'm a bit paranoid to the others whether they are being true to me or not.

But again lesson learned: always learn who your enemies are.

Selfie lords! xx

Abby / Shaira

Abby! We've been friends since the junior year and I could remember her telling me that she never expected us to be friends like we were now because she thought that I was going to be a popular maarte. She thought that I would be friends with the other beautiful girls in our school and that I won't notice them (she and our friends). But it turned out that she was one of my closest friends in DS because first of all, we both loved wattpad and second, we like to study when we both feel like studying and sleep in class whenever we don't feel like studying. Though there are also times when we don't get along when we got annoyed by each other, I still consider her as my friend because even though that I annoy her and she annoys me sometimes, she never backstabbed me like the others. Also, I believe that if I don't know the negative side of a person yet, then I'm not close to her. And since I already knew her negative side, it means that I'm already close to her and that I will still stay as her friend.

Chrissy! My only gay close friend. He was the one who always makes us laugh with his stupidity and because of him, I became a student teacher. Not literally, of course. :)) hahaha! Its just because, I always teach him about the basics in our subjects and everything because I'm worried about his grades. He was always failing his subjects and our teacher even threatened him that he won't graduate high school. I already expected that he won't graduate because despite of all the sermons we gave him everyday, he never listened. Thats why after we learned that he won't graduate, we didn't scold him anymore instead we made fun of it telling that he doesn't have to worry about his PeTas because he's going to do that again next year. It was harsh, of course, but we decided that it was better than scolding him everyday. But it turned out that our teacher was just scaring him to make him study but I think that it did the opposite because he didn't do any PeTas that are on individual, he just helped on the ones that are by group. I really thought that he won't graduate but there he was, wearing his toga and everything and a proud graduate of Dominican School! Well, I just hope that he would change his study habits on college because I'm afraid that he won't have a good future if he would act the same way he acted on high school.

Danielle with her parents! We got along well because we have the same likes and interests. Not really on our favorite artists or favorite movies, but on the way how we don't like to comb our hair and the way how we look on life. Does that make any sense? Hahaha! Also, whenever I want to go somewhere, she was the one that I always call because I know that she would always say yes. Hahahaha! She's simple and our prom queen! Well, she didn't really got the crown but she was nominated and in our minds, she's still our prom queen. We always call her "Prom Queen' after that and makes her a bit annoyed but it was funny because until the end of school year, it was still her nickname. 

And those are our pictures. It took almost 2 hours to upload these and I think it took more time on the video but I think its all worth it because I had fun making descriptions there. It made me realize that I had fun in high school after all though I just remembered the bad memories until now. But I think that I should already erase that from my mind from now on because there will be another chapter in my life: COLLEGE! I really hope that college would be fun for me and I hope that I would meet a bunch of people that would be memorable for me. But I also wanted to thank high school because high school taught me to be strong in every hardships that I would encounter. Maybe it took a long time before it had an actual effect on me but I'm still glad that I learned it. But don't get me wrong, being stronger doesn't mean that I became a bully nor a street fighter (though I got into fights when I was in second year). It means that I learned how to be happy even though there were cliques of people who were probably laughing at you like you were some kind of a joke. For me, that is the meaning of being strong because instead of breaking down in your bedroom and ranting why they hate you, you should just focus on your friends more because they are the people who truly care for you, not those bitches. Thats why always remember: smile, be strong and dream.